Chapter 34

“How long have you been taking these?” Bo Mei asked, pulling a prescription bottle off the kitchen shelf.

Mila shrugged. “I don’t know. I took them since I was twelve or so, I think.”

“You’re still taking them? Do you know what they’re for?” the woman asked suspiciously.

Mila colored deeply. “Yes. And my mother was right to give them to me. Without them I think terrible thoughts.”

“What sort of terrible thoughts?”

“You don’t want to know.”

With a sigh, Mei returned the bottle to its place on the counter and weighed her next words. “I am not so sure that you need them.”

“Ha! Easy for you to say.”

“Why do you think you need them?”

“To make me normal,” Mila said impatiently. “To make me like I should be.”

The housekeeper shook her head. “I think that’s exactly why you don’t need them.”

“Look, Mei, please, I don’t want to be a boy. It’s awful, and dirty, and I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all.”

The grown child looked so mournful that the woman dropped the matter. They continued cleaning the kitchen until the doorbell rang signaling the arrival of the hired car. Together they went out of the house and journeyed to a natural foods market not far from Mila’s home. She paid strict attention to everything the housekeeper offered in the way of advice and soon their cart was overflowing with organic items. They paid and returned to the house just in time to prepare a wholesome supper for two. With the car gone again, Mila felt cheerful. She was managing just fine without her mother.

She stirred the risotto according to Bo Mei’s instructions and watched the housekeeper set two places at the kitchen table. When the chicken and rice were done, they ate together, at first in silence, but as their stomachs filled, with increasing conversation.

“The letter… have you contacted your attorney about this?”

“Not yet,” Mila said, shaking her head. “I mean, in a way, it is a big shock. To know that some part of Michael might be out there… On the other hand, no one knows for sure that the baby is still alive. It’s so weird to think there could be another member of my family out there walking around. I could have seen them at the grocery store and wouldn’t have known.” She put down her fork and stared thoughtfully out the window. “Supposing I do find this bastard child of my brother’s—what then? The baby would be only about seven years younger than me, so they could be married themselves or… who knows!”

Mei agreed with a nod of her head. “You know what this needs? Some of that wine we bought today.”

She got up, sought out the alcohol, uncorked it and poured two glasses. She offered one to Mila and kept its partner for herself. Together they sat and drank companionably while the housekeeper tried to figure out what she could possibly offer this person that would help her transition into a normal life.

“So,” the woman said after a pause, “do you want to find this child of your brother’s?”

“I guess,” Mila shrugged. “I feel like I should. I feel like he would want me to.”

“And your mother?”

“I don’t know why she was looking for the child. Maybe for the same reason? It seems unlikely, though, given her feelings about children born out of wedlock.”

“Yes, she was most insistent about that.”

“Well, thanks for all this, Mei,” Mila said, yawning as she looked out at the darkened sky through the kitchen window. “I think I’ll call it a night. Do you have everything you need?”

“Yes, thank you,” the housekeeper smiled. “I will be comfortable.”

“Okay, then, goodnight,” Mila said, returning the gesture. She left the woman alone at the table with her thoughts, and took her own with her to her bed.